Costello: No, I told you I want to turn it off.
Abbott:   I know, you press the Start button--

Costello: Wait a second. I want to turn it off. I know how to start it.  So tell me what to do.
Abbott:   I did.

Costello: When?
Abbott:   When I told you to press the Start button.

Costello: Why should I press the Start button?
Abbott:   To shut off the computer.

Costello: I press Start to stop?
Abbott:   Well, Start doesn't actually stop the computer.

Costello: I knew it! So what do I press?
Abbott:   Start.

Costello: Start what?
Abbott:   Start button.

Costello: Start button to do what?
Abbott:   Shut down.

Costello: You don't have to get rude!
Abbott:   No, no, no! That's not what I meant.

Costello: Then say what you mean.
Abbott:   To shut down the computer, press--

Costello: Don't say, "Start!"
Abbott:   Then what do you want me to say?

Costello: Look, if I want to turn off the computer, I am willing to press the Stop button, the End button, and the Cease and Desist button, but no one in his right mind presses the Start to stop.
Abbott:   But that's what you do.

Costello: And you probably Go at Stop signs, and Stop at green lights.
Abbott:   Don't be ridiculous.

Costello: I'm being ridiculous? Well, I think it's about time we started this conversation.
Abbott:   What are you talking about?

Costello: I am starting this conversation right now. Good-bye.